Rest Management Training, what is it?

Since the inception of COVID stirring anxiety and reeking fear, people’s nervous systems have been bouncing all over the place. Nerves, questioning every cough from their neighbor, side-eyeing anyone who dared not to wear a mask in the privacy of their own home or in public, and even going to the extent of questioning others on their stance “vaccinated or not?” There was NO rest at all.

I almost lost good friends because of all of the commotion and the subtle impacts on others’ values that began to truly become exposed. At one point, I remember thinking, “Wow! Where is the love?”

The media did not want us to rest. Hollywood did not want us to rest. Even a few sermons I was able to catch and gently walk away from, did not offer rest. So now what?

I moved from my place of rest in Northern Michigan living off of a nature’s preserve  to face the pandemic with my Mother, downstate in Detroit. We both lived alone and needed each other. During the transition and once moved all in, into a home experience I departed 22 years ago, rest was a challenge to maintain.

Renovations were being made to my Mother’s home for two months. I sponsored a fundraiser in support of Black Businesses through a marketing campaign for TUT. Needless to say, there was much planning and preparation in place for the campaign. I relocated not just my residency but my business. I had to connect to my native land as a foreigner and reintroduce myself as a friend. My nervous system was in constant think mode. In some instances, my nervous system was all over the place as I also had to focus on staying healthy, safe, as well as progressive.

Taken from the Times (date unknown)

Pepper taking the elevator up

The daily breath-taking-elevator-ride to the new office, located in the Renaissance Building facing the Detroit River, triggered my psychosomatic responses in a healthy way. The elevator ride began the creation of an aura of rest for me. I was reminded of what I missed from Traverse City, nature. But I was on the move and rest, was somewhere close by that only I was responsible for grabbing and holding on to.

BECOME INTENTIONAL…

The word intentional has been a go-to-word for me for some time now. Be intentional on how you awake in the morning Shonda. Be intentional with the words you speak to others Shonda. Be intentional on how you love yourself Shonda. Be intentional on what projects you say yes to Shonda. Be intentional because your life was created with intention. Ok, got it!

So if my mind believed I lived amongst chaos, then the question was how do I be intentional about resting in the midst of chaos? What did rest actually represent for me when I assumed I had rest? And if I had rest, how did chaos force rest to leave me without my permission? Clearly, I’m a metacognitive thinker. I simply process and think about my own thinking processes. Sounds like a lot but at some point, we all think about how we actually think about what we actually think.

ai – yi – yi …

This awareness of self however, keeps me in line with myself and reflective of my interactions with others. Long story short, after all of the processing, I became intentional about resting. How?

For starters, I only elected to place myself in spaces that oozed calm and slowness. While everyone around me was going going going, I was pacing myself. Pacing my steps, my words, my behaviors, and asking myself, “Why are you in a rush? Slow down.”

In my slowing down, I took my yoga and drum music to my Mother’s backyard where folks were watching me, laughing at me, and who knows, probably video recording me. Totally unbothered. I took breaks between clients and covering the office in Lysol. I traveled with my bike in my trunk to grab a ride whenever the mood felt right. Some nights when I left the office late, the walk along the river eased my soul. This lasted for a few months and like the old adage goes, “change is constant” so flow with it. With more intense changes came a need for more intentional resting. To be clear, resting does not equate to sleeping, for me. Sleeping is sleeping. Resting, well, I believe is intentional.

So, here’s what resting is: an awareness of self emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually and attending to calming each area.

Emotional rest is achieved through setting healthy boundaries with yourself and others. People who and places where I experienced tension in my body, I did not frequent. If I had to go into those places and be around certain energy, and my disposition was questioned, well, a conversation was had about what supports my mental health. No guilt.

Taken from Project Happiness

Mental rest is achieved when you feel achieved. We hear Winners say often, “I’m only in competition with myself,” therefore, be kind to yourself when creating your things to do list. If 50 items are on your list and you only accomplish two major items in a day, you feel unachieved. So break the list up into smaller achievable goals based on your necessary deadlines. Long-term goals do not need to be on your short-term goal list. This is a set-up for mental chaos. Set yourself up to accomplish mental rest.

Physical rest is achieved when your heart (emotions) and mind is at ease. When you are able to place trust and faith in the constant change process, you have learned how to manage your rest. COVID created non-stop changes for the world. Everyday there was a new discovery, more deaths and sickness, and another requirement for safety. Although my emotions and mental thoughts were calm, my body still felt anxious. During these times of unrest, I found myself anchoring myself to be still in silence focusing on my breathing (deep breath in… slow breath out). Scanning my body to identify areas where I felt tension, knots, and discomfort. I sat in those moments and touched my body softly and gently. I spoke to my body with words of acknowledgment such as “I feel you”, “I know you are there”. I even asked my body “What are you trying to tell me that I need to pay attention to?” Guess what? I listened. My body received me listening to her and my desire for-her-to-be-in-her-best-state-of-being. She spoke back to me with release. Amazing!

Of course, this type of intentionality connected all of me (emotionally, mentally, and physically in the most calming physiological state) to Spirit. When pieces of yourself are in alignment with one another, this does not necessarily mean you are free from chaos poking around looking for what chaos can stir up. In fact, that’s the job of chaos. When your WHOLE SELF is in alignment, this also does not mean your body is free from sickness or aches. When YOU are in alignment with YOU, this means that YOU have decided on what is good for YOU. (Period) Your Spirit has taken a stand. There is now room for Spirit to be welcomed into your WHOLE Self of being. Physiological alignment allows the Whole Self to be free to Create and Imagine the beauty that lies within the path.

After this revelation, the REST MANAGEMENT TRAINING RETREAT – March 17 – 20, 2022 was accomplished. Five participants with no knowledge of one another, for three nights under one roof to intentionally focus on rest through structured activities, group-centered discussions, and good food circled me back to this conclusion – Rest is necessary for optimal functioning and needs to be intentional. REST MANAGEMENT is ‘Spiritual Intentionality’.

Details from the Rest Management Training Retreat Co-pilot study will follow in May’s blog post in honor of Mental Health Awareness Month.